Monday, July 9, 2007

Spaced out.

As the child of divorced parents, I am constantly trying to figure out what areas give couples the most trouble, so that I might avoid the same issues in my own relationships. Obviously money, child-rearing, religion and sex are biggies. But I've conducted super-scientific research* over the past year or so, and believe I've come across something more detrimental to relationships than all those elements combined.

MySpace.

I think MySpace, in general, is a problem. It's cyber-crack. You indulge, KNOWING it's ultimately not going to be good for you. But catching up with old friends and getting to create a mini-advertisement for yourself makes you feel good. Then you want to stop because you recognize the lameness/hazards of the whole thing, but you can't because it's far too addictive.

But when it comes to relationships is where it gets really tricky. First, there's the cyber-stalking of the ex. In my case, this activity has proved quite rewarding, as my ex has started to look like a meth-addict since he's been dating his new girlfriend. Were this not the case, however, and were his girlfriend even remotely attractive, this activity would no doubt have a far different effect on me.

Then there are the complications that arise before you even start dating someone. I sent a guy to the 'Heap after seeing a picture of him on his MySpace page being hugged by two topless chicks. I've also scrapheaped guys for lame movie/tv show/music tastes. Or for having too many hot-chicks-that-are-clearly-not-real-friends as friends.

But the biggest issue when it comes to dating and MySpace seems to be when you're actually IN a relationship. My sister was quite serious with a guy when this random "friend" of his started posting all these risque' messages on his page. My sister immediately got insecure about things - and understandably so. Then another friend of mine was dating a girl that got irritated that she'd changed her status to "In a Relationship" while his still said "Single" - and understandably so. Then there's the "check-out-the-new-person-i'm-seeing" business, where you send the page of your new S.O. to your buddies, only to have it ripped apart by your friends.

"So you'd be okay with having a stepson? I thought you didn't want kids."

"Wait, she's a PROUD PARENT???"

"Um, did you look at her page? How did you miss that? Even if you didn't read her profile, surely you saw the pictures of her holding her kid?"

"I thought that was her nephew."

The only solutions to all of this, of course, is to simply delete your account. But of course, that would require admitting you have a problem. Which, for the record, I don't.*

*This is a lie.

1 comment:

T.S. said...

This is pretty good, I never thought of all that.